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Ladies Code's Zuny Is So Cute

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Now I actually have to pay attention to Ladies Code. I better get accustomed to all of the vocal masturbation and obnoxious yelling in their songs.

[MV Review] CNBlue - Can't Stop

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Amidst all of the SNSD/2NE1 comeback wars, everyone forgot that CNBlue was making a comeback, including myself. While going back and looking for music that come out recently, I saw that CNBlue came out something new and realized that I didn't even recall seeing any teasers or news about their comeback. Talk about coming back at a bad time.



When I first started listening to the song, I thought CNBlue was doing their Busker Busker impersonation, as I was about to fall asleep until the chorus kicked in. I like the chorus in this song, as I find it fairly catchy, but the verses are boring my comparison. I feel that they are too slow for my tastes, as I prefer faster and harder rock. Then again, if CNBlue strummed some of their pubes loud enough to where it would make some noise, I'm sure their fangirls would love that too, so I'm probably just not in the target demographic for CNBlue's music.

The music video is basically an ode to how jjangbak white women are to an Asian person. I guess "Once you go Caucasian, you don't any Asians" is their creed to live by. I've been seeing a lot of random white women in boy bands MVs as of late and never really understood why.

Apparently Yong Hwa started dating this white chick after finding out that Seohyun in fact does not have a vagina, or any reproductive organs for that matter. He had sworn off Asian women forever and found a white woman to date. Their relationship didn't last long, and he wrote a song about how great this white woman was.

Considering that 98% of their fans are Asian women, it's probably not the best idea, but hey, whatever.

4minute - Come In Teaser

Tiffany Is The Lard Ass In SNSD

Fancam Appreciation #5 - Hello Venus' Ara, 4minute's Hyuna

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I watch Hello Venus fancams to avoid Ara's Frankenstein face, but apparently she has a lot of fans. For those of you with monster fetishes, here you go. Ray also linked me to some Hyuna fancams...and I'm not really a fan of hers either, but I know I'm also in the minority there, so you can find those fancams after the jump.






If you want to send in suggestions for this series, use the Contact form!

Stop the Lizzy Duckface

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Bear witness to the undeniable beauty that is After School/Orange Caramel's Lizzy.

lizzynon1

One of the most attractive women in k-pop, this resource of precious fap material is under threat.
 
Data collected by independent research shows that at current rates of discovery of new fappable Lizzy pictures, k-pop fans may be past "Peak Lizzy" period.

peaklizzy

The cause of this scarcity in quality is clear - "Lizzy duckface".

lizz

Duckface is of course perfectly acceptable and attractive when actually kissing:

lizzynon2

However, in increasing quantities the unwelcome presence of duckface poses is ruining otherwise fappable Lizzy selcas.

lizzyduck1

lizzyduck2

 lizzyduckface14

lizzyduckface15

lizzyduckface16

It's not just self-taken photos - even official promotional Lizzy photos are not safe from the scourge of duckface.

lizzyduckface4

lizzyduckface3

Behind-the-scenes video footage has also fallen victim to this insidious threat:


Who will protect the impressionable youth of today from the duckfaces of tomorrow?

It must stop.

Just like anyone else looking to bring about any sort of social change in today's armchair-happy point-and-click age where people are happy to tick a box on a website but couldn't be bothered to actually do anything away from their computer screen, I've made a petition on change.org:


Please sign and share, so we can have more Lizzy pictures like this:

lizzynon3

And less like this:

lizzyduckface18

Let's change the world, k-pop fans - one Lizzy selca at a time.

Dahye

Cherry Blossom Ending Challenge

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The song is rising back into the top 10 on the charts again, so it's yet another year where we have to hear about how 'great' this song is. I propose a challenge. How long can you listen to the song without wanting to kill yourself?



To this day, I am baffled with how this song (and group) ever became popular. The compositionfag inside tells me that this song is basic as fuck, as I try my hardest to stay awake while listening to it. The vocalfag inside of me hates the lead singer's voice. There's zero appeal to me.

Anyway, I made it to 2:32 before I had to exit the video.

[MV Review] Ga-in - Truth or Dare

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Ga-in released Truth or Dare last month and I totally overlooked it because of all of the attention given to Fxxk U, on top with the fact that Sunmi also came back. I embedded the performance version above, but if you wish to view the full music video, click here. The MV review will be based off of the full music video.



I actually like this song a lot. I kind of wish that this song was promoted over Fxxk U, because most of the attention that song got was the fact that Ga-in was having Human Centipede-esque sex in the shower in that music video, and I honestly don't remember that song at all. I only remember being creeped out by the music teaser. By now, everyone should know that it takes a lot to creep me out.

The jazzy beat compliments Ga-in's vocals very well throughout. I really like the fact that despite being from BEG, Ga-in doesn't try to have her vocals take over her songs. Sure, she's no Jea when it comes to singing, but to my untrained ears, it sounds like the producers know how to bring out the best in Ga-in with songs like this instead of trying to force her to belt out some ballads. This is particularly why I enjoy Ga-in's songs a lot more than BEG's songs. I enjoy the beats in the songs, but they never feel like they are trying to do too much. I think BEG tries to be too "innovative" with their songs and concepts and it has always been off-putting to me. I'm probably one of the few people that prefer Abracadabra and Sign to the rest of their choreography.

Now that the song has enticed me, let's see if I can stomach the full MV, as I have avoided that until right now. The fucker is eight minutes long and I really don't like watching long ass MVs anymore thanks to T-ara.

....

And it was just a documentary MV. I searched for a few minutes to see if anyone giffed Ga-in at 1:40, but I couldn't find anything. That's a shame, as that was easily the most amusing part of the music video for me, aside from Narsha squeezing her own tits together.

It's a really solid comeback song for Ga-in and I'm looking forward to her next solo promotions.

BoA Sings The Theme Song To Fairy Tail 2014

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In a random act of managing, Avex decided to actually put some effort into promoting BoA this year by having her new song Masayume Chasing be the tie in theme song for the continuation of the Fairy Tail anime series.

Bom's Face

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I don't know whether to be an asshole and laugh at her or to be human for a change and feel sorry for her. Well, Bom's obviously not human anymore, and that means I don't have to be human, so I'll be an asshole and laugh at her.

Look at CL. She's laughing at Bom, too. 

How To Learn Korean (Or Any Other Language) Part 3

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There's no witty caption this time. Kim Tae Hee is just amazingly hot.

Back in December, I wrote parts 1 and 2 to this series, but there's plenty left to cover. Those two parts can be seen as to getting a start, but no real path as to learning the language. Part three will specifically deal with how to self-study without any access to people to help you and for people who want to learn, but don't have a lot of time and/or the will to turn it into a big commitment.


This post is mainly inspired by some people around here saying that they wanted to start learning a language, but didn't have the time because of their schedule. Language learning is one of those activities that you can fit into your schedule no matter how busy you are, as long as you willing to use some dead time you have during the day to dedicate to learning language and less time daydreaming about having a foursome with Jiyeon, Hyomin and Eunjung. Okay, maybe you can still daydream about that foursome while working on your language of choice (I can explain this in more detail when it's relevant in the article).

Just a heads up, this will only prime you to be ready for when you have more time to dedicate to the language and/or have people to talk with on a regular basis. You will not become fluent by following what is provided in this post, but if you stick to a regular schedule and do just a little bit everyday until your circumstances change, you can be at a lower intermediate level. You'll be able to speak on a limited basis and understand common words/sayings, but don't expect to speak like you can in your native language. The best ways to become fluent are intensive studies where you treat language learning like a full-time job or immersion, where you are surrounded by the language and do not use your native language to communicate nor use it when you are watching TV/movies, listening to the radio/music/etc. and reading. These steps will just help you reach a decent starting point before you are able to dedicate more time. I'm using the same exact tips I'm giving here because I no longer have the time to dedicate several hours to language study anymore due to school and work about to consume my life.

Like I mentioned in Part 2, I recommend downloading Anki, because you will definitely need this program. The space repetition system will allow you to retain more information and will keep you studying every day. However, there will be changes to the plan from Part 2. I'll outline steps to take, and this part shouldn't take more than 10-15 minutes to do.

1) In your learning source (either one of the textbooks or websites I recommended), read out loud the sentence. If you're using a textbook, type it into Word, and put the English translation below. I'll make up an example.

저는 한예슬이 너무 섹시하기 때문에 한국어를 공부해요.
I am learning Korean because Han Ye Seul is really sexy.

For example, let's say we're learning the "기" form in Korean. A common structure in Korean is VERB+기 때문에, which means "because of VERB". Here, what we're focusing on is '섹시하기 때문에', which is 'because (subject) is sexy'.

So you type that into Anki, and using cloze deletion cards, I'll show how you can learn the structure.

[front side]
저는 한예슬이 너무 섹시하[cloze #1] 때문에 한국어를 공부해요.
I am learning Korean because Han Ye Seul is really sexy.

[back side]
저는 한예슬이 너무 섹시하때문에 한국어를 공부해요.
I am learning Korean because Han Ye Seul is really sexy.

[front side]
저는 한예슬이 너무 섹시하기 [cloze #2]에 한국어를 공부해요.
I am learning Korean because Han Ye Seul is really sexy.

[back side]
저는 한예슬이 너무 섹시하기 때문에 한국어를 공부해요.
I am learning Korean because Han Ye Seul is really sexy.

[front side]
저는 한예슬이 너무 섹시하기 때문[cloze #3] 한국어를 공부해요.
I am learning Korean because Han Ye Seul is really sexy.

[back side]
저는 한예슬이 너무 섹시하기 때문한국어를 공부해요.
I am learning Korean because Han Ye Seul is really sexy.

Refer back to this article on Supermemo. Make sure you understand the sentence before you put it in. Anki is for review and for strengthening your understanding. Read any explanations of structures and understand it before you put the sentence in. If your textbook has quite a few example sentences off of that one structure, type them all into Anki. 

The reason why there are three cloze deletions is because you really want to break down the sentence and structure. These are production cards, so you want to be able to actively recall the particle that is missing. This is extremely vital because you will be able to actually use this structure after testing yourself on it so many times.

For example, let's add in another sentence that uses the same structure.

봄은 성형수술을 많히 받기 때문에 이제는 봄의 얼굴이 움직이지 않아요.
Bom's face doesn't move now because she has done a lot of plastic surgery.

Again, you would cloze out "기", "때문" and "에" like last time. However, let's say you didn't know what 성형수술 means. You look it up in the book/lesson you're using and you can cloze that out as well.

So, you have three cards for the Bom sentence, but you can add another card that clozes out 성형수술, which means "plastic surgery".

[front side]
봄은 [cloze #4]을 많히 받기 때문에 이제는 봄의 얼굴이 움직이지 않아요.
Bom's face doesn't move now because she has done a lot of plastic surgery.

[back side]
봄은 성형수술을 많히 받기 때문에 이제는 봄의 얼굴이 움직이지 않아요.
Bom's face doesn't move now because she has done a lot of plastic surgery.

Let's say you add about 5 sentences of that structure, and you also clozed out a couple of new words that you used. That's all you need to do on that front for the day. Study the cards, and make sure you can recall them and get the right answer instead of just cheating and quickly going through the cards. You'll notice with Anki that you'll only see each sentence once that day despite having 3+ cloze deletions for each card. The next day, Anki will show you the second cloze deletion while you're reviewing, and the third day you'll get the third card. It only gives you one new card from the sentence until you run out of new cloze deletions. This will help, because you will see each sentence a lot of times, and it will be ingrained into your memory.

This process shouldn't take you very long, and you can even break it up to add one sentence at a time throughout the day. Go for a low number (say 5), but make sure to do it every day if possible. Don't make a habit of skipping days. 365 days x 5 sentences = 1825 total sentences. Over the long run, it adds up. (And with that many sentences, you'll probably be done or close to being done with the beginner textbook you have, having a really good command of what you have entered into Anki.

Now, to get pronunciation practice, repeat out loud the sentences several times, and make sure to repeat words that you stumble on multiple times. This will take just a few minutes out of your day. This is the easiest part to do. You want to practice saying correct sentences a lot. 

Now, you have practiced saying out loud the model sentences in your book and review the ones you have put into Anki. Now is the time to start using those structures. But shit, you don't have anyone around you to practice with. You feel confident with the input practice, but now you want to practice output. There are several tactics to overcome this.

You can do drills where you practice making your own sentences using structures and vocabulary that you just learned. You can do this anytime anywhere in your head. Say you're driving to school/work, in class/the office and nothing is happening, taking a shit/shower, jacking it, whatever, you can also practice making some sentences.

Let's work with the -기 때문에 structure, along with the following structures: -기 전에 (Before VERB) and -기 시작하다 (Start VERB).

저는 케이팝을 좋아하기 때문에 한국어를 배우기 시작했어요.
I started learning Korean because I like Kpop.

한국어를 배우기 전에 영어만으로 대화를 나눌 수 있었어요.
Before I started learning Korean, I was only able to have conversations in English.

저는 아침마다 샤워를 하기 전에 똥을 싸요.
Every morning before I shower, I take a shit.

Now, with that last sentence, let's use the other structures.

저는 똥을 싸기 때문에 샤워를 했어요.
I took a shower because I took a shit.

저는 샤워를 하는 도중에 똥을 싸기 시작했어요.
While I was taking a shower (In the middle of taking a shower), I started to take a shit.

You can work on manipulating a sentence with different structures. You can do this in your head while you are doing other things. You can practice anytime and anywhere. If you want more practice, visit sites like Shared Talk to chat with people and use Lang 8 to write out sentences.

You can easily spend about 15 minutes out of your day to type up these flash cards and review them, spend a few minutes reading out loud those practice sentences, and throughout the day practice structures (new and old) with words and phrases. You can do this without a major time sink, and within a year, you should be able to say a lot of things. You won't be fluent or anywhere close, but you'll have a strong base before you have time to do intensive studies.

You remember when I mentioned daydreaming about that foursome with Hyomin, Jiyeon and Eunjung. Pretend that you're having a conversation with them in your target language! You can have Jiyeon say "Please oppa, stick it in my butt" and have Eunjung say "I will gladly suck your cock" while you daydream about banging them. Win-win.

If you have any questions or any ideas you want me to tackle in future posts of this series, comment below. 


[MV Review] 4Minute "Whatcha Doin' Today?"

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What are you? My mom? Stop asking me so many questions, 4Minute.


Soooo glad Hyuna's not my mom. For so many reasons.


[Warning: This post contains lots of big pictures and at least one very bright, fast gif*.]



Everyone's favorite skanks came back this week with "Whatcha Doin' Today?" If the song sounds familiar, that's because it was produced by Brave Brothers, who also produced the group's last two tracks (and the majority of kpop for the past few years).


What we really should be asking is "When is this guy going to leave?"


"Whatcha Doin' Today?" shares a similar message to 2Yoon's "24/7," encouraging listeners to throw off the shackles of everyday life and enjoy living, be it through partying, laughing, or drinking Americanos.


You drink that coffee, girl.


The song contains a few disturbing similarities to last year's "What's Your Name?" Both songs suffer from having too many musical layers and an abundance of that rap/singing hybrid 4Minute loves to do. "Whatcha Doin' Today?" is still a staggering improvement on the horrendous "What's Your Name?" whose fetid stench still haunts me today. "WDT" is a more traditional song, unlike that non-song; transitions more smoothly; and doesn't make my ears bleed. It's not great or anything, but at least I plan on listening to this new song again.

The music video really saves this release, though, as it's a hot mess, just like 4Minute. Things start out normally enough, with a Hyuna solo scene then a group dance.


Exhibit A of "Why I'm Glad Hyuna's Not My Mom"


Then things get weird. Apparently, "fun" for 4Minute involves lots of plastic clothing, candy, and voyeurism.


Don't act like you innocent, girl. I know what you're really doing.


You see, through the video, we learn how 4Minute lets loose on the weekend — swinging. Sometimes, it's a group thing in a public restroom:




Sometimes, it's a little exhibitionism by the street:


Exhibit B


But always, it's hardcore:


Exhibit "This is All the Evidence One Really Needs"


These scenes provide insight into the members' private lives and help shape the bond between the group and its fans. I feel like I know more about 4Minute now.


Perhaps more than I ever wanted to.


BOTTOM LINE: Fabulous video aids the slightly-better-than-average "Whatcha Doin' Today?"




* Gifs courtesy Soyeon Chingu.

Toheart (Woohyun & Key) - Delicious

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SM teamed up Woohyun and Key to make an inter-group subunit...all for the sake of brainwashing teenage fangirls into swallowing for their oppas. If love is delicious and nutritious, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that love was substituted for 'jizz' in the song. I think this is a great marketing campaign from SM, as it explains the virtues of girls swallowing oppar's cum not because of the taste, but because of the health benefits.



Despite how thin Koreans seem in contrast to us fat fucking Americans, obesity is a growing problem Korea. From OECD's own website, obesity among adults is less than the typical Western country, but the obesity rate for children is pretty alarming. Given South Korea's barely existent birth rate, South Korea will eventually become a nation of fat fucks like Western countries are today.

SM sought out to fix this problem themselves, using their best assets: young men who have millions of crazy teenage fangirls willing to listen to their every word. SM knows full well that SNSD can't promote for 50 years (since SNSD's contracts expire in 2047), SM needs the next generation of females to not be a bunch of fat girls. No one will be stanning 뚱뚱한 시대, so the problem needs to be tackled before it's too late.

In order to get females away from eating junk food, which could cause them to become fat if they don't control their eating behaviors, SM wants teenage girls to swallow their boyfriends' sperm by saying it's nutritious and delicious. It doesn't have to be factual, but this method deters girls from gorging themselves with Twinkies.

Fucking genius, SM. Fucking genius.

NS Yoon G Comeback Teaser

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The song could suck ass and I wouldn't care. I'm already hyped for her comeback.


POSITIVE post: 3 people who I like in k-pop right now

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I've recently been alerted to the fact that some people think my k-pop blogging is "negative" and that I'm just hating on everything I can for cheap jokes and generally getting off on being a rude and unpleasant person.  Gosh, what a strange perception.  This is obviously untrue as clearly someone who genuinely hated k-pop wouldn't spend so much time writing about it, so why are some people so easily confused about this?

cond


I think part of the confusion is cultural: Australians tend to have a highly irreverent sense of humour and communicate with insults a lot, even to people that they like, and I'm certainly no exception to this.  If you watch the following Australian viral video, and you're from another country, you'll probably laugh, but if you're also Australian, you'll cringe in equal measure, because you will know people personally who are just like this - and you'll know that it's not even an exaggeration.


Like our friend Darren, I tend to take the piss out of what I like just as much as what I don't like (although I'd like to think I'm slightly less of a cunt about it than Darren is) so I can definitely understand how that could be a bit baffling to the casual observer from overseas, and why someone might read my writing and incorrectly believe that I just hate everything under the sun - it is definitely not the case!

Nevertheless, I know many people don't ever believe anything I write here (even when I'm proven right) so now it's time for me to deliver some proof.  So it's with a big-time POSITIVE attitude that I now present to you the following list, for your entertainment:

3 PEOPLE WHO I LIKE IN K-POP RIGHT NOW

1. Suzy (miss A)

suzy_e

Unlike a lot of people, I don't really get a boner over Suzy - in fact she's definitely my least favourite member of miss A in that aspect.  However, Suzy really got into my POSITIVE books lately in a more general non-sexual "you're fucking cool" sense over her recent appearance at some awards ceremony nobody gives a fuck about.


When receiving this shitty award for some bullshit dickwank, she did some supposedly horrible things like:
  • thanked her dog
  • moved her head from side to side a bit
  • laughed
  • seemed nervous
  • wasn't that well prepared
Doesn't sound to me like someone who intended disrespect - sounds more to me like someone who really didn't think they had a hope in hell of getting a fucking award in the first place, and given the way people criticise her acting, who could blame her for thinking that way?  Either she's too shit at acting to deserve an award, or she's a great actress who should have expected to win and should have had a speech prepared - you can't have it both ways, guys.  In fact if she went up and DID have a careful speech prepared netizens probably would have turned the tables and torn her to shreds, saying "how dare that talentless bitch presume that she'd win the award over those veteran actors and even have the sheer arrogance to prepare a speech in advance as if she was a shoe-in".

Of course everyone took a great big smelly cyber-dump on this nervous teenager anyway, because younger people are easier to cyberbully, and international netizens in their usual mad scurry to think and act as much like Korean netizens as possible, echoed the thoughts.  All the people hating on Suzy probably wouldn't even dare to criticise Alex Lifeson from 70s rock group Rush for this speech (which I've linked before but here it is again because it's so great), which is for a far more high-profile award than what Suzy is getting:


...so why the double-standard?  If someone wins an award, surely they've also earned the right to do their own speech, their own way.  Suzy was probably nervous as shit and trying to liven up the event because award ceremonies are so fucking completely boring.  I've been to a few, and let me tell you firsthand; on TV you only get the edited highlights of the awards people care about the most.  The award for "best combined ukelele tap-dance performance in a TV drama that aired between the hours of 3am and 4am", they don't televise that shit, but if you're at the event, you still gotta sit through it.  These events drag on for fucking hours and listening to hours after hours after hours of different people going up to get awards and all deliver the same boring generic speeches where they thank all their employers and their family in professional grammatically correct inoffensive language is like trying to cut down a tree with a nail file while simultaneously doing the "Cherry Blossom Ending Challenge".  There's a reason why they have free food and alcohol at these things.

damon3

Also, if I ever win one of these fucking awards (presumably for "most rambling pointless blog post", "most unpopular opinions" or "biggest arrogant cuntfaced douchebag"), you bet your fucking life I'm thanking my cats, and I'll make a point to thank them before anyone else.  So Suzy's alright by me.

2. SULLI (f(x))

sulli-

I've discussed Sulli a lot in various posts in reference to her sexy catchphrases as well as general hotness, but this post isn't directly about either of those things.  Instead, I'm going to shift focus to Sulli's behaviour, which I must say is exemplary and definitely a POSITIVE force in the world of k-pop.

Those of you who have ever held down a job at some point in any kind of industry involving constant contact with the general public will know that there's a thing called emotional labour.  A very underrated aspect of work, emotional labour can be very taxing depending on your personality and requires that you basically show warm pleasant emotions to people who you may in reality perceive as worthless wastes of oxygen and carbon and that you would prefer to stab a thousand times in the face rather than talk to for more than ten seconds at a time.

Western pop stars are generally not expected to perform any emotional labour - getting through the song in a functional fashion is considered the only key requirement, and anything else is really a bonus.  Korean pop stars, on the other hand, are definitely expected to perform emotional labour - and not just while on stage!  Any time that they are in front of the camera or in front of the general public, your bias has to maintain the resolute fake-happy facade of an airline stewardess.  Grandmother just died?  Smile for the camera.  On your period?  Smile for the camera.  Just gave a blowjob to the production manager backstage and he obviously hadn't showered in a week?  Smile for the camera.  Etc.

Unless you're Sulli, in which case - fuck it.
sulli1 copy

I don't know about you, but I think idols work hard enough and pander to the whims of childlike fans and judgemental couch-potato assholes enough as it is.  It wouldn't hurt the average spoiled Korean entertainment connoisseur to get used to the concept of not having their genitals sucked through the computer screen every three minutes.  What we need is more idols like Sulli not giving a fuck, and eventually we can progress to the beautiful place the west is in where singers can betheirbeautifulselves on stage and life just goes on.

3. Kim Kwang Soo (CEO/ex-CEO, Core Contents Media)

kimkwangsoo

We all hate this dude - something all k-pop fans can agree on, right?  But wait.  I can't think of any k-pop CEO (or ex-CEO, whatever) more never-endingly helpful or willing to go out of his way to please a bunch of whiny spoiled cunts.  Sure, he's certainly got his dark side, like any other k-pop CEO (the rest are just better at not getting caught out) but we're being POSITIVE here so let's look at some of the nice, POSITIVE things KKS has done for T-ara and their fans over the last couple of years.

*  Fans were noticing the lack of boobies in T-ara, so KKS dutifully responded to the call and added an extra bonus well-endowed member to T-ara for your perving pleasure.  Well played, sir.  What a nice man, looking out for the fans first.  Response: all you ungrateful shits fucking complained.

Fans were noticing that T-ara was a bit shit sometimes on live stages, and this was holding them back from being a top-tier group, so KKS heard your complaints and added more members, and also told existing members to lift their fucking game or they're out.  Response: all you ungrateful shits fucking complained.

*  Fans kept complaining about Hwayoung being basically crap and useless, so KKS, noticing that you were all correct, removed her.  Response: all you ungrateful shits fucking complained and decided you wanted the rude bitch and her shithouse rapping back in the group after all.

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*  Fans also kept complaining about how KKS wasn't clearing up the bullying rumours and wouldn't apologise so KKS offered to meet the T-ara haters, not over the Internet but in person and reveal everything.  If you're not immediately blown away by that fucking fact, then you're obviously new to how big companies like this work, so let's put this in perspective for a fucking second.  Imagine the boss of Endangered-Fish-Meats-R-Us contacting the head of Greenpeace and saying "hey, I know you don't like my marine-life-slaughtering ass very much, after I've clubbed this baby seal to death, made the blood into a nice seal smoothie and put it on my online store for sale how about we go and get a coffee somewhere and talk calmly and rationally about our disagreements?"  That's the kind of scale we're talking about here.  Response: the pathetic haters complained and ludicrously declined the meeting because he wouldn't let them also meet T-ara thus giving themselves away as secret T-ara fans, something KKS was smart enough to realise and acknowledge in his...

*  ....motherfucking hand-written letter of apology.   Holy cunting fuck - what CEO of any company anywhere does something like that, ever?  Sure, it's one thing for the group to do it, but the CEO?  Getting a CEO of any company anywhere even just to admit "yeah, okay we fucked up a little, kinda" is almost unheard of but apologising formally for an entire scandal - accepting blame and not weaseling out of anything - in a handwritten fucking letter?  Mind fucking blown.  Here's an exercise, go to Google right now and type "CEO handwritten letter of apology" into the search bar and see what comes up.  You'll notice that KKS is there on the first page of the search... why?  Because he's the only CEO who's ever written an apology letter which is actually even remotely sincere and worth a damn.  That's how fucking unprecedented this is, you k-pop fans are getting the gold star treatment from this dude and you don't even fucking realise it.  And best believe he wrote the fucking thing too (not that it matters who writes it) - his 18 year old hot secretary who is blowing him doesn't have handwriting anywhere near that good, we all know kids can't write these days, it's all about computers now.  Response: as usual, all you ungrateful shits fucking complained.

*  Let's not forget Dani.  Everyone on the planet with an Internet connection and the slightest interest in k-pop made sure to cyberbully the fuck out of poor underage Dani and said "please don't debut Dani in T-ara".  So KKS didn't debut Dani in T-ara (and still won't). Response: all you ungrateful shits fucking complained (oh, and cyberbullied her some more for good measure).

*  During all of this, people kept asking KKS to step down as CEO.... so he fucking did.  Response: all you ungrateful shits fucking complained okay you actually mostly liked that one... even though it may not even be true because recent press releases still refer to him as the CEO, and even if it is true, he's probably just been moved to a lower-profile position, with more power.  Oops.

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All I ever read about KKS is constant hate, but the poor old guy has been struggling to do the best for the sake of his groups and their fans all this time.  Don't like his decisions?  Maybe your unqualified, inexperienced ass should stop fucking telling him what to do then, because perhaps the problem isn't that he doesn't care about your opinion but that he cares too much about it.  Maybe if he just did his own thing instead of listening to the whining of every crybaby with a keyboard and an Internet connection perhaps he wouldn't have second-guessed himself enough to fuck things up so badly in the first place.  Just maybe.
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So that's the end of this POSITIVE post.  I'm hoping that you all got the extremely POSITIVE vibes from my writing and you're ready to look at some of k-pop's bigger scandals and issues in a whole new POSITIVE way.  Or maybe you hated this post and you still think I'm a negative cynical asshole who shouldn't be writing blogs in which case you can POSITIVEly go and get fucked.

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Sunye Is The Ultimate Troll

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Last year, Sohee left JYP Entertainment to focus on acting, but Sunye resigned with JYP Entertainment, giving fans some hope there would be future group activities. Lol nope.



This is the best trolling I have seen ever since I have been following Kpop. I thought ZE:A's Kwanghee and T-ara's Hwayoung were great trolls in their own right, but nothing beats Sunye. Despite re-signing with JYP Entertainment, Sunye will be going to Haiti for five years to spread the gospel.

Fucking genius.

If you don't see me writing for the next five years, it'll be because I'll be in Haiti spreading the gospel about Yeseulology.

Yoona Shows Some 'Skin' For Pictorial

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Misleading title? Yeah, I'd have to say so.

I'm back from my trip to Haiti already, as the government kicked me out for trying to pass off a woman as a god. The government told me it was blasphemous, so promoting Yeseulology didn't work out so well.



If you look really closely at the first image, you can see a little bit of cleavage. The effort is appreciated Yoona, but showing your back isn't really showing off skin in the figurative sense.



All Hail Hyomin

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I hope this is a preview of things to come in Hyomin's solo ventures.

Unf unf Iljin Whore Goddess Iku Iku!



Apparently SM is being accused of massive tax evasion lol

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The website segye.com is reporting that SM has been evading a shit load of taxes through creative loopholes such as creating a singer named "SM Entertainment" in Hong Kong and funneling money through that, among other stuff. Apparently this isn't the first time such accusations have been made against the company such as in 2003 but nothing really came of it. The 19th Seoul Regional Tax Authority and the IRS have been investigating SM for a while now and have discovered that over 30 SM employees have been evading taxes worth a couple USD tens of millions of won.

There are rampant rumors regarding the SM Annual General Meeting being held today/tomorrow (3/21). It does seem convenient these rumors would show up now of all times. 

At any rate we can only speculate what effect this will have on the Suju M comeback. 
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