Many of you may not remember, but U-Kiss has had an
unfortunate track record over "begging" for fan gifts. It isn't the first time idols have been called out for doing bizarre shit for money (
Crayon Pop immediately springs to mind), but this latest shit really takes the cake.
They're literally begging for money to fund their new album.
This global crowd-funding "project" is being hosted on a site called "
KPop Funding," and to their benefit, it's a slickly designed site so there's SOME sense of legitimacy here. To make things better/worse, the site was linked through U-Kiss's
official Facebook page. Here's the screenshots if you don't want to or can't log into Facebook to see it:
At the moment, it's not too clear whether or not the album's production absolutely depends on the crowd-funding efforts. U-Kiss hasn't done any Korean work since Stop Girl in September of 2012, so it's not like it's been THAT long since they've been gone. On top of that, the fact that they HAVE done some random tours and promotions in Japan SHOULD mean that NH Media isn't completely broke yet. There does still exist the possibility that U-Kiss flopped too hard for profit margins, and this is a half-baked attempt at recouping losses.
But when we take a look at the crowd-funding rewards, one can't help but think that this is all an insidious plot by the masterminds behind the Hallyu Wave.
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| 2000 KRW = $1.84 |
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| 3000 KRW = $2.76 |
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| 5000 KRW = $4.60 |
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| 10 000 KRW = $9.20 |
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| 75 000 KRW = $69 |
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| 125 000 KRW = $115 |
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| 1 000 000 KRW = $920 |
Shitty gifts aside, the real eye-opener is that 125 000 KRW level donation. "DNA Accessories." What the actual fuck is a "DNA Accessory?!" Are they going to give you a ring made from your oppa's pubes? Maybe an amulet filled with his blood/semen/piss/shit? Maybe a pendant with his toenail clippings? I shudder to think what exactly one of those things entails. Or worse yet, how exactly they're going to collect all of that shit. And how are you supposed to tell which member you're getting DNA from? Can you choose which one you get DNA of? It would probably suck if you were hoping for an AJ or Kiseop ass-sweat vial, but you get a fucking Kevin shit nugget charm bracelet instead. Thankfully(?), the only way those things are being provided is if at least 1000 people donate to the U-Kiss Beggar Fund. It sucks for the fans if it ends up being like 999 people donating 125 000 won, they'd be shit out of luck. But I suppose it's better this way for the U-Kiss boys. This way, they have an out of getting plucked like chickens in the name of the "music."
This whole thing sounds like a fangirl/sasaeng's wetdream since it's literally giving them a piece of their oppa for the low low price of 125 000 won ($115). So worth, especially since they don't have to go through the trouble of rooting through the garbage for used condoms or try to break into the dorms to vacuum pubes off the floors. IF this whole project is real and not an elaborate trolling scam, it sets the horrifying precedent of KPop beggardols selling DNA accessories as fundraisers. Fuck t-shirts, why go through the trouble of paying for graphic designers, t-shirts, printing, shipping, and advertising when you could just sell pube pendants??
As of this writing, there's no donations yet but it's only a matter of time before the money starts pouring in. All the JPop wotas better watch out, because KPop fangirls are coming for they wigs.
